My goodness, it’s been just a couple of days and I am already far behind on the blog! It happens so quickly!
By far and away the most important detail of the past few days is my checkup! Now I know I’ve talked about my checkups on here before, like here, here, here, and here. But rather than them becoming “old-hat” and no big deal, it is exactly the opposite. Every checkup brings up anxieties and fears that have been buried just below the so-busy surface. Every journey up to the seventh floor makes me think I have just pushed the wrong button until I shake my head and remind myself,
“Oh yeah, you ARE a cancer patient. This IS your floor.”
I really doesn’t get any easier. But I tell you what it DOES do. It makes me appreciate life that much more. For the past three, count them THREE, checkups, I have become acquaintances with another lady who sees my doctor as well. So, yes, she’s a breast cancer patient like me. The first time we met, there were several of us waiting and we struck up a conversation amongst ourselves- how old we are, our cancer story, how we are doing, and we always find something to laugh about in there…I mean, you HAVE to! This lady was my age and was diagnosed in the Fall of 2008, like me. She had her husband and their 2 kids there with them that day. We found out that she was there because of symptoms, not for a routine checkup; she was diagnosed with a recurrence that day. My heart broke for her and her little family.
The last time we went for a checkup, in May, she was there again. This time with only her husband, and she had made a dramatic change from the woman I had met just months earlier. She was smaller, more frail, and I could tell by looking at her that things were not going well medically speaking. Again, my heart broke and I thanked God over, and over, and over again for my healing.
And yesterday, we saw her and her husband again. I wish I could tell you that she was up and thriving, but in fact it is the opposite. She was in a wheelchair and was wrapped up in hospital blankets. We got a few moments to talk before they called her back, and she said that her treatments were not working, and that she is now doing an experimental treatment. We didn’t talk specifics or get into details, heck, we have never even exchanged names, or email addresses or anything. But knowing her through the common bond of our disease is enough that when our eyes meet, we just know. I cannot get her off my mind today. I am begging God for her miraculous healing. Please keep her in yours prayers, also. I don’t know her name, but I know God does.
I distracted myself with a couple of magazines, then proceeded to doze on my hubby’s shoulder! What?? That never happens, trust me! My bp was still a good 147/90, which is actually good for the dr’s office!
The appointment included all the usual things: a full physical exam, questions and answers, review of lab work (which was all good), and of course some visiting but we tried to keep the small talk short-ish because we already had plans to go out to dinner with Tim and Heather that evening. But in our talk, we discussed my “hypochondriac” tendencies (every ache and pain being cancer) and he agreed to order a PET scan for September when I have my regular mammogram. Yay! Or not…I can’t decide. I mean, I want to SEE, full body, that I don’t have cancer lurking somewhere. I am so aware of catching something early, if it’s there.
So is this something that he would have ordered if it hadn’t requested it? Probably not.
But does he love me enough to do it anyway? Yes. Thank you, Lord, for guiding me to not only the best and brightest, but also the PERFECT doctor for me.
And just like that, we were done!
I come back in a month for my mammogram and PET scan and to see Julie, then in 3 months I will have another checkup with Tim. I don’t know how long these 3-month checkup intervals continue, but I hope they are for a long, long time. I like the idea that someone is keeping an eye on me. Don’t cut me loose!
Umm, and we can just say, camera-phone photo in a very dim restaurant does not yield the best results. But it’ll work I guess.
So this ends another checkup and a fabulous evening out with our friends. We can’t wait until they come stay here later in August and we can get in some much needed river time together! I can’t believe it’s been a year since they’ve been here! But with 8 kids between us, schedules can get a little hairy…this we know! But we are already looking very forward to it!
Count your blessings,
check your boobies,
and breathe deeply.
Love you all.